halloflamer | POKEGEAR (MoM IC Contact)

[The laugh that rings through his mind makes Blue flush even harder- when was the last time he'd ever heard Red laugh out loud?]

[(And well, even if he could hear Red's voice in his mind, the idea that Red could pick up on whatever he was thinking maybe hadn't quite sunk in... So Red can probably pick up on him wondering that to himself, too.)]

In this world, people are considered to be like animals, too... [Blue drawls slowly, sleepily, and yawns.] Maybe it's something like that.

Edited 2017-12-09 21:07 (UTC)

[It's true - even the thoughts that Blue tries to keep to himself will come through to Red if he isn't careful to conceal them. That one in particular brings about a small pang of guilt in Red's chest, but he does his best to keep that thought from transmitting - he's had a bit more practice at this than Blue.

[I've never been able to talk to humans like this before.

[It's kind of weird, isn't it?]

[Luckily for Red, Blue doesn't notice his flinch to that thought at all-- although perhaps that won't bode well in the future. He has no way of knowing, yet, that even his stray thoughts make their way to Red.]

[There's a pang of guilt from Blue as well, the idea that Red would think himself weird just for ...communicating, like a normal person. Blue props himself up again and leans in, pressing his lips to Red's with a smile that he hopes doesn't look too pained.] What're you talkin' about? It's fine. [...Then again, would Red feel even more self-conscious, being told he was 'normal' for once? Blue doesn't quite know what to say.] If you don't wanna talk, you don't gotta. Either way.

[No matter how much Blue always wished it.]

[Blue's thoughts are subtle, passing, but each one makes Red's heart swell painfully in his chest. He probably can't tell that Red can hear all that, can he? It makes Red feel a little guilty for picking up on it - how much Blue wished he would talk, how it would hurt him to be told that he was "normal". He falters a bit more noticeably this time, but offers a weak smile.

[I do want to. I just can't most of the time. You know?

[He knows. Red knows he knows. But that doesn't make it any easier. For either of them.

[I'm sorry, Blue.]

[Blue balks, clear that he was caught out, and flushes, ashamed of... something. That he made Red hurt again, guilty about something he can't and has never been able to control. It was just part of him. As frustrating as it was, Blue loved him for it equally as anything else.]

I-it's fine. It's fine... [He mumbles. Why does he keep lying, even though Red can tell? Well, what else is he supposed to say? It's something neither of them will ever be able to fix, no matter how much it hurts. But that won't stop him from trying to lessen the blow on Red.]

[Think about something else. Anything else. The warmth, how safe and at peace he felt here, curled up against Red- moreso than he'd ever felt. Before the outside, the fact that they were trapped in a dangerous world that wasn't their own, began to intrude again.]

[Red's smile weakens further and eventually fades as Blue's thoughts creep into bother of their minds. He clears his throat a bit, curling his arms more tightly around his boyfriend while he, very clearly, tries to distract himself with thoughts of warmth, comfort, the way that it feels just to lie together like this...]

I love you.

[That, he says out loud, but now that he can, he adds silently:

[I love you so much. We make a pretty good team, don't we Blue?

[They can overcome this. They can overcome anything if they try. He knows that. Surely Blue must know that too, somewhere deep down.]

[Blue, curled up against Red, doesn't see the smile fade from his face, but he feels it; there's a sensation creeping into his mind of discomfort, familiar discomfort that he knows now that he's experienced Red's memories before. It makes him flush further, and he turns and buries his face against him again, nose rubbing in against his skin as he nuzzles, tries to ignore it.]

I love you, too. [He replies, but quiet, voice slightly broken with sleep and shyness, then shivers as Red's voice drifts into his mind, a deep, soothing timbre. He shuts his eyes and nods, and then tries to focus on something- a memory, one that filled him with warmth, wondering if Red would be able to feel it, too.]

[It was a memory plucked from their childhood, one of many happy days filled with sunshine and the oceanside of Pallet Town, scuttling Krabby on the beaches and carefree games where they'd throw rocks as Pokéballs and act out mock battles, race each other where the beach gradually shifted to the grassy woodlands that bordered the other side of town. In those days there were no anxieties, no loneliness, no driving need to please everyone around him; just Red and the endless possibilities that lay ahead of them, together.]

[Blue realizes after a long few moments, eyes squeezed shut against Red's chest, that he's been holding his breath, and finally releases it with a slow shudder. Holding on to these dreams had become second nature, all these years. It still hadn't sunk in to look forward rather than back.]

Edited (edits a thousand times) 2017-12-12 23:05 (UTC)

[A warm, slow smile spreads out across Red's face as Blue's memory floods his mind. He must have a thousand just like it - like that one time a stray "Pokéball" went flying and nailed Red in the face. Blue had cried more than he had, wrapping his little arms around Red's waste and begging for forgiveness. The memory now brings out a warm chuckle from the man - barely audible, but in his mind, it rings out loud and strong as if to say, Remember that?]

[Against Red's chest, a loud snort of laughter erupts, Blue's shoulders shaking as the memory bubbles into mind from his own perspective. He'd seriously thought he'd be in big trouble, that Red's mom was going to forbid them from playing again-- when in reality, the rock had hardly left a lump.]

[Blue lifts his head again, this time wearing a wide and sheepish grin, and scoots up so that he can press his lips to Red's. I love you, he thinks, again and again, a hand slipping under the blankets to lace fingers with Red's.]

[No one else could make him feel like this- safe, wanted, a better person. He had to be better, for Red.]

[Red's face flushes a bit at the kiss, the stream of soft (even for just being thought) "I love you"s that follow. He gives Blue's hand a small squeeze, chest aching at the thought that Blue had to be anything other than who he was for Red...

[I love you, Blue. I love you just the way you are.]

[Blue smiles, soft, a bit sad, and shakes his head. Glancing away, he buries it back in the nook of Red's shoulder and breathes him in, letting it back out with a small huff. A crybaby? he thinks, probably intended to himself, sarcastic; but he remembers again that Red will hear it and sighs.]

[No, it wasn't about the crying. It was about the things he did to cover that part of him up. It was the bully, the ego, the barbs he protected himself with. It was hurting without thinking, spouting cruelty and then regretting it immediately.]

I have to be better. [He reaffirms, murmured into Red's shoulder, and squeezes his hand again.]

[It's nothing that Red shouldn't know - well, nothing he hadn't assumed, anyway, based on the few small talks they had managed to have. But hearing it come so personally from Blue, so honestly, leaves a lump in Red's throat while his arms wrap even more tightly around his boyfriend.

[We can both be better...together, right?]

[Blue can't help a soft breath, a laugh of disbelief, and leans up on his elbows again to look at Red.] You don't gotta... make me feel better, you know. Saying stuff like that.

[That Red thought he had anything about himself, his personality, to fix was...]

[Well. Red was always the perfect one, after all.]

[Red can't help it - he shakes his head.

[I'm not perfect. Nobody is. And I want to get better too, Blue. I'm not just saying it, I mean it.

[We can do it. Both of us. You and me.]

[That was... a lot of words.]

[Blue stares a little, dumbfounded, then flushes again as he realizes that thought was probably broadcast. --Shit. And that one too. He gives up and buries his face into Red's chest again.]

[Meek, and small, but the thought comes trickling into Red's mind nonetheless.]

Me too.

[Red offers his boyfriend a weak smile, but it's full of affection.

[Better, then. Together.]

POKEGEAR (MoM IC Contact)

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