[They're both standing there in gasping silence, staring back at one another, and there's a failure in communication between them that's been present for years, irreparable. Ever since the day Blue told Red to go home, ever since Blue shoved Red out of the way and took Eevee's ball, ever since Red beat him the first time, and the second time, and the times again and again after that, ever since the day Blue realized the real reason why he worked so hard to stay ahead of Red- and why he never really was. Neither of them can say it, afraid of the consequences- this delicate balance they'd taped together in desperation the past couple of years.]
[It was only the appearance of things being settled. They'd "talked" over it, sure- Blue had. He had made his apologies for the cruel remarks, the childish competitions, let slip some of the regret, but it had all been careful and withheld, the things he felt safe in regretting. They'd never really talked about the hurt, about home. They'd left Kanto and they didn't look back.]
[Now they were in a pressure cooker, this place where people hurt and killed without a second thought, where anyone could disappear at any time and leave their friends alone. Red could be gone in a moment and Blue would never-- he'd never get to--]
[Blue was the first to run ahead, always, and this is no exception. It's more like stumbling, though, fairly throwing himself across the room and collapsing over Red, arms propped on the back and side of the couch. He can see his face clearly like this, despite how he always tried to hide his thoughts and feelings under that stupid hat. Always trying to keep everyone out. Always keeping Blue out. He just wanted to be let back in. The way things were, all those years ago. I'm sorry. I said I'm sorry. Why do you still keep me out?]
[His weight shifts onto the couch, one knee beside Red, and he can't quite help how awkward it is with the lack of motor functions he has right now, but one shaky hand releases from its grip on the couch and cups Red's cheek, then the other as he stares into eyes he's known all his life, full of all the pain he's caused them, and his weight gives out as he gracelessly mashes his face against Red's, lips to sloppy lips.]
[It wasn't the first kiss Blue had always dreamed of, soft and purposeful and tender, but it was full of all the feelings he couldn't find the courage to give breath to, all these years.]
[He still couldn't, but when his breath runs out and he breaks away from Red, gasping unevenly, heart racing in his chest from panic and excitement, he can only choke out one truth in desperation.]
no subject
[It was only the appearance of things being settled. They'd "talked" over it, sure- Blue had. He had made his apologies for the cruel remarks, the childish competitions, let slip some of the regret, but it had all been careful and withheld, the things he felt safe in regretting. They'd never really talked about the hurt, about home. They'd left Kanto and they didn't look back.]
[Now they were in a pressure cooker, this place where people hurt and killed without a second thought, where anyone could disappear at any time and leave their friends alone. Red could be gone in a moment and Blue would never-- he'd never get to--]
[Blue was the first to run ahead, always, and this is no exception. It's more like stumbling, though, fairly throwing himself across the room and collapsing over Red, arms propped on the back and side of the couch. He can see his face clearly like this, despite how he always tried to hide his thoughts and feelings under that stupid hat. Always trying to keep everyone out. Always keeping Blue out. He just wanted to be let back in. The way things were, all those years ago. I'm sorry. I said I'm sorry. Why do you still keep me out?]
[His weight shifts onto the couch, one knee beside Red, and he can't quite help how awkward it is with the lack of motor functions he has right now, but one shaky hand releases from its grip on the couch and cups Red's cheek, then the other as he stares into eyes he's known all his life, full of all the pain he's caused them, and his weight gives out as he gracelessly mashes his face against Red's, lips to sloppy lips.]
[It wasn't the first kiss Blue had always dreamed of, soft and purposeful and tender, but it was full of all the feelings he couldn't find the courage to give breath to, all these years.]
[He still couldn't, but when his breath runs out and he breaks away from Red, gasping unevenly, heart racing in his chest from panic and excitement, he can only choke out one truth in desperation.]
Don't go.